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Why Do So Many Couples Break Up During The Holidays?

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Breaking up during the holidays has been a thing for a while now. It's not an uncommon thing, but it's also not always a widely understood thing, either. So, why do so many couples break up during the holidays? There are quite a few reasons such as, emotions running high during the holidays and family drama happening. Always being on the go during this incredibly busy time, and having to spend time with people that you don't even like. Perhaps you or your partner aren't making the necessary effort during this forced next step in your relationship, and you realize you just don't want it.

Whatever the case may be, we've got the breakdown for you here. Keep reading for more details, and see if you and your partner have what it takes to survive the holidays together!

Holidays Are An Emotional Time

Why do so many breakups happen during the holidays? Well, there are a lot of reasons, and most of them are emotion-based, in the end. The holidays are an emotional time for everyone. they seem to bring up all of those family feelings that we carry around the rest of the year long, and for some reason, they seem to amplify them. You'll get all of the warm and fuzzy memories, as well as the feeling of understanding that there are going to be some family members that you'll never have the warm and fuzzies with. There's also dealing with the feelings of loss that come from not being to celebrate the holidays with those who have passed on from our lives. All of these things can be really hard to deal with, and no one will understand these issues and dynamics better than our family members do. When it comes to new people coming into the situation though, some of the emotions that are flying around can be a little bit difficult to take.

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Family Drama Happens

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As mentioned this is the time of year when emotions running pretty high for a number of reasons, and those family issues that seem to come up every year can end up rearing their head at some pretty inconvenient times. Whenever we enter into a relationship with someone, there are always some family dynamics that are less than desirable, or at the very least, less than perfect. Being in a relationship means dealing with and taking on a lot of these types of family dynamics, and that can be a lot to handle for some people. There's always going to be a bit of family drama, but if you're in a situation with someone where you realize that the family dynamic is just a mess that's going to be a mess forever, chances are that you're going to question whether or not this is something that you want to stick around for. Family drama issues can end up having a deep impact on relationships, especially since they aren't usually just limited to holiday gatherings.

You're Always On The Go

You're constantly on the move, because you now have two families that you need to be present for over the holidays, and that can be incredibly stressful, especially if there are step families involved as well. How can anyone keep their sanity when it's the busiest time of year, and there isn't any time to relax and just have a good time? This one factor can push a lot of people to the breaking point when it comes to relationships. Everyone is tired, you're all over the map, you've got time off and instead of being able to relax and enjoy it, you're running all over the map trying to see everyone. There is nothing about this time that isn't stressful, except for maybe the times in between when you're not actually in transit, and you can have a drink and enjoy some quality time with loved ones. What everyone ultimately wants though, is to be at home, relaxing, and enjoying some time off. When you're this irritated, it can definitely take a toll on your partner, and your relationship.

Your Two Sides Of The Equation Don't Mesh

This may sound really shallow, but now that you've met the entire family, do you really see yourself becoming a part of this group of people? Looking forward, that is ultimately what is going to need to happen, if you're going to stay with your current partner. So, if you're feeling like a fish out of water among the relatives of your partner, and you're starting to realize that once the love blinders come off, they're just another one of these strange people that you have nothing in common with, you're not alone. You'd actually be surprised at how much this happens. This is a time where you're getting to know each other, and a big part of getting to know each other, is getting to know each other's families, because families are a part of the entire package that goes along with being in someone's life. If either person feels that they can't take on or deal with the other's family, then there's a good chance that the relationship isn't going to go the distance.

One Or Both Of You Are Expecting Too Much

Give your partner a break. Seriously, they are under just as much stress as you are, and their family means as much to them as yours does. If you've both made it this far and you're both still standing, then just relax, and make a point of enjoying all of the family time as much as you can. It'll be over before you know it, and you'll be back to your regular lives. For now though, it's showtime. When this isn't a possibility, then you have yet another reason why relationships tend to break up around the holidays. When it comes though, this kind of a stress level and irritability, then if one or the other is expecting too much, the other is sure to snap at some point, and not be okay with it. This is a demanding time all around, so for any person trying to survive it, especially when half of it is among strangers, or people you barely know, then any additional demands are not going to be looked upon favorably. Expecting too much from your partner at this time of year is a sure way to end up on the road to splits-ville.

You're Not Pulling Your Weight

Tis the season to do your fair share of the shopping, preparing and planning for everything that comes along with the holidays. This time is by far, the most stressful of the year, and if you're taking a free ride while your partner is putting in all of the elbow grease, then you really shouldn't be surprised if you wind up single. Sure, a lot of what you have to do during the holidays does suck, but at the same time, it still needs to be a team effort, and you both need to pull your own weight. Checking out mentally and choosing to float through the whole thing isn't going to land you a long-term partner. It's actually a perfect way to make sure that they end up resenting you, and give you the boot after the holidays are done - or before that. This time is hard enough to get through, without having to worry about managing someone else's dead weight, so if you're not doing your fair share, then be prepared to end up ringing in the new year as a solo unit.

You're Not Ready

You're meeting your partner's family now, so if this isn't something that you're feeling good or even remotely optimistic about, then you're probably not ready to be doing it. Since you've already gotten to this particular point, chances are that voicing this to your partner isn't going to go over very well, so whatever you end up deciding to do, chances are that if you address your true feelings about it, you'll be single as soon as the conversation is over. There's nothing wrong with not being ready. That's not something that you can help. It's not a crime to not want something, and it's also not something that anyone should feel obligated to do. If you're not ready, you're not ready, and this is another reason why people breakup during the holidays.

It's A Forced Next Step In Your Relationship

Further to the last point, if you're not ready and it's now expected of you that you meet your partner's family, or vice versa, there's going to be a lot of pressure and tension. A lot of times, people feel like just because they are dating someone during the holidays, they are obligated to participate in their partner's family events, that likewise, their partner is obligated to participate in theirs. It's basically a forced next step in the relationship, and no one wants to feel like they're being forced into taking such a huge step if they're not ready. Once these introductions have been made, you are now expected to attend all family functions going forward, and if you weren't ready to take this step, then you're sure to be left feeling trapped and like the only way to avoid the forced next step is to bail. The best thing to do to avoid this, would be to talk it out as a couple in advance, and if both or either of you aren't ready to be making this step, then don't do it yet. Just because you're dating doesn't mean that you have no choice but to spend the holidays with each other's family. That's not a realistic expectation.

You Realize You Just Don't Want It

Well, isn't this just saying it? Fair enough. Maybe you've realized that lo and behold, this simply isn't something that you want, and you no longer want to be in the relationship. After seeing all of the other dynamics and how your partner's family is, how they interact with each other, how much your family didn't like them, and the whole deal, maybe you realize that this isn't a person that you can imagine hauling kids around with from family to family during the holidays, and that spending this time with them has been more of a chore than anything else. These kinds of realizations can happen, and when they do, you're probably not going to be together for much longer. The holidays tend to make these realizations pretty obvious, and if either of you had been having any doubts about the relationship before, this would usually be the time when a decision was ultimately made to walk away. Gotta love the holidays!

Whatever The Case - Be Honest

If you're really into your partner, then this is a really good time to show it by being present, available, and showing that you're looking to be a part of a team with them. If you're not looking to do these things with your partner, then it's a good idea for you to have that conversation with them now, and to be open and honest. There are sure to be some unpleasant emotions that fly around when you do this, but at the same time, it's much better than either of you having to find out the hard way down the road. If you can be so honest prior to the holidays, then that's the best way to go, but if it takes getting to the holidays to realize it, then you'll have to make the best of the time that you have at that point. Whatever you do, remember that honesty is the best policy.

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